This next story is almost one for the movies, so grab your popcorn and soda! About 15 years ago, I met my friend Nicole in Junior college. Believe it or not we met in probably the most boring of classes, Art history! Sitting in the dark watching slide shows of art, trying to be quiet, and bored to death to the point of falling asleep. Somehow Nicole and I became friends, and we chatted it up the rest of the semester. Months later we started slinging pancakes and bacon at a local breakfast restaurant.
Fast forward and Nicole is a momma to a little boy named Jayce (6 1/2) and 2-step kiddos Colt(7) and Charlie (6). Let me tell you, she almost scarred me from having a baby of my own. I was lucky enough to be in her hospital room while she was in labor with Jayce. I didn’t see the whole thing, thank goodness! But, I saw enough to know that labor was no joke, and Nicole was a tough little cookie! Nicole got a divorce after being married for seven years, and was then on her own. Life sure brings you surprises when you least expect it.
One day she was in her car at a stop light and looked over to see her old boyfriend Mike sitting in his car next to her. Mind you they dated when she was 21 in college, and he was in the service. They exchanged numbers, and now they are married with a baby boy on the way!! I couldn’t be more excited for both of them, to find love again ten years later. The love they have is so hard to find, and you can see he adores her to pieces.
Nicole now finds herself in a house with four boys, and two male dogs to top it off. She has her hands full, but she does it with a smile everyday! I never hear stress in her voice, or worried if she can get it all done. You will find Nicole most weeks running her son to school in the morning, then to drive 15 min out of her town to drop her step children off, and then to go to work for the family business. I look up to Nicole for her courageous heart, her determination, and work ethic in everything she does.
Being a mom of all boys, how do they all get along?
Kids aren’t always going to get along every second of every day. But what I feel is important is to look for common ground to bring them together. Maybe two want to go swimming, and the third wants to stay home and rides bikes, well we always find a common ground and everyone ends up happy because we try to do a little bit of everything. It’s interesting, two boys will always be on the same page and the third is doing something different, and its any combination of two. Two always want something, and the third is into something else. It actually works out well because it always gives that one child at that moment to be independent and do something on their own. It always seems to work out.
I know your so excited to be pregnant, is there any part of you that is scared to have four boys under 7 and why?
No, not at all. We wanted this, we planned and chose to have a baby together. This was something Mike and I had talked about before we got married, and we both wanted to have one together. We are so excited to watch the dynamic of our family grow and change. The kids are so excited to be big brothers. I still remember the night we told the boys we were going to have a baby. We actually got it on video! Their faces were priceless! Their little faces were all smiles, and it was so exciting asking them each individually what they wanted the baby to be.
Colt wanted a boy and wanted to name him Thor and wanted to teach him how to ride a dirt bike, Jayce wanted a boy named Rocket and wanted to teach him dirt bike tricks, and Charlie wanted a girl Rambo and then switched to wanting a baby brother and wanted to teach him how to ride a bike. The excitement and energy were unreal, and it hasn’t stopped. It’s really fun watching the kids ask questions about my growing tummy, watching the tummy move, and the boys think it’s an “alien” inside growing! Ha Ha! Most days you can catch the boys hugging my tummy and giving their baby brother kisses. There is just a sweet innocence about the boys and their genuine feelings about their soon to be baby brother!
When all the boys are home, what times of the day is it hard and when is it easy?
With three young boys, they all have different times of the day that can be challenging. Where one might not be a morning person, the other two are. I feel knowing that about your children and keeping them focused and motivated through those challenging times is what gets the family through it. I would say sitting down to eat dinner can be challenging because they’re usually playing with friends and pulling them away to eat chicken, and green beans isn’t easy…. But keeping them motivated on guess what’s for dessert tonight is a good goal to keep them focused on settling down and eating a healthy dinner. Some of the best and easiest times of the day is getting that big hug when you pick them up from school, and they share their cute special stories with you about their day and what they learned. It’s fascinating listening to how they interpret ideas and then share them back with you. Setting up individual goals to keep them focused to get them each through their challenging parts of the day is the best way to keep them all individually focused.
How has this pregnancy been different then with Jayce? Do you have any crazy cravings?
This pregnancy has been very easy. I really have no complaints at all. I feel like pregnancy is all about your mental attitude. If you are positive, you are going to feel good, and your attitude will stay positive. I enjoy being pregnant, and since this is my last time, I’m enjoying it. We are a very active family, every weekend its always something. Last weekend our three boys competed in their 4th dirt bike race. It was so much fun watching the boys excel and ride as fast as they could to pass their opponents. As a mother/step-mother of 3 watching them take off at the starting line is very nerve racking, and I run across the track the entire time cheering the three of them on! The best part is watching them cross the finish line unharmed!! I can’t wait to see our little guy Baby #4 get on his dirt bike and meet his big brothers on the race track!! Having four boys is going to be so much fun!
My pregnancy with Jayce was pretty easy as well, so nothing is really different. I don’t have any cravings! Everyone asks me that, and I have a boring answer, but it’s the truth no cravings. When I was pregnant with Jayce, I couldn’t stand the sight or smell of ribs. I thought that would happen this time, but nothing has bothered me at all food wise.
Oh my gosh, what a great question. I have dreamt about what I want for them. I would love to see them each excel within their own personalities. They’re so different, and their personalities are so unique. It would be so heartwarming to see the boys take over the family business just like Mike is doing. However, I understand that might not be their dream. So in that case I want them to be successful in something that makes them happy.
I hope they all marry beautiful, intelligent woman who enjoys going shopping so I can have some shopping partners!!
What different personality traits do the boys have?
Well, right now Colt the oldest is a walking encyclopedia, and Jayce and Charlie want nothing to do with it. Like I said above two are always on the same page. They all are ALL very focused on school. Homework is a big deal in our house, and we sit and do homework nightly with our boys. They all just brought home outstanding report cards within the last week! It’s so rewarding as a parent to watch your kids put in so much effort and flourish and grow!! We have noticed them starting to notice girls (I thought that didn’t happen until like Jr. High). Then we just caught them all looking a magazine, and they were arguing over which girlfriend was theirs. We don’t make a big deal about it because we want our kids to feel comfortable sharing these little moments with us. Colt, Jayce, and Charlie are so unique and have their own set of qualities. We feel it’s so important to let them express themselves and grown within their own personalities and keep cheering them on along the way!
Now that you have told the Mother Effin Truth, who do you want to nominate to tell their story as a mother? And why?
Now that I shared the Mother Effin Truth I would like to nominate Casey Donabedian, she is such a sweet friend, mother and wife! She is married to a fireman and spends most of her time holding down the fort and taking care of her cute little guy Jake and precious daughter Carsyn, while Jeff is working hard for his family! I can’t wait for her to share her story with you!