Fake is far from the truth, at least in my eyes. I’m as real as you get.
I wash clothes, dishes, and babies butts all day. I cook breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day. I listen to complaints, questions, and whines morning to night. That’s my definition for the word “mom”.
So as you all know I’m a stepmom. Stepmoms don’t get recognized very often. We don’t get the high fives after a big win; we don’t get the thank you’s all the time, and we get labeled as second best.
We have all signed up for this role, and even though some days are rougher, we just roll with the punches.
If you are a stepmom, you have or will hear “your not my real mom” at some point. My point happened this last week. They think the words will stab you in the heart, and guess what they are right.
I never want to be his mom, but I want to be recognized as a mom. I do the role but get no credit.
So the other day, I heard the words “you are a fake mom,” well that’s a new one. Those words stab me more because fake isn’t a word I like nor feel like I demonstrate. I let it roll off my back, but then the words kept coming out of his mouth.
The good news is; we kicked those words to the curb. We heard from a very wise man to inform my kiddo that yes I’m not his “real” mom but one thing I am is his parent.
Hallelujah to the brilliant man that summed up what I was looking for. Just that one word described who I was on the daily, and who I wanted to be for Ethan.
I don’t want to be his mom, stepmom, or a friend. I want to be his parent. A parent who shows him the ropes, tells him to say his manners, makes him brush his teeth, and hugs him at night, and to tell him I’m proud of him.
So I’m upgraded from a fake mom to a parent in just one email.
Man words can either hurt or heal the heart.